Posts Tagged ‘LOve’

Ever been in a crisis
A crisis too deep you don’t know how to get out
A self-inflicted crisis with murderous results
A crisis you saw coming but chose to ignore?

Now ever been in a spiritual crisis
Where day and night you wonder if you are still in the faith
And to drown that still small voice telling you where to go
You indulge in what your depraved soul knows best – sin
Ever been in a spiritual crisis?

That you need the word so badly but feel like you’ve gone too far to be redeemed
And so again instead of climbing out, You dig yourself deeper into the pit
You know the way out but walking in it suddenly seems so hard
You don’t know who to reach out to or how to
Scratch that, you know exactly who to reach out to but wonder if they’ll ever understand coz you can’t even explain it
If they’ll look past your wandering and feed you with the word you so deeply desire
Because after all is said and done, you realise it’s all vanity
Why would I gain the whole world and lose my soul
Why would I gain the appeal of man only to be disowned by my Maker
Why would temporary pleasures satisfy, or rather feel like they satisfy when in reality they are killing me
Why gain that relationship and lose out on the one that matters most
Why would I do all these and yet I am a Christian
How did I go these far, how did I miss the signs
Is this indwelling sin or have I just lost it
Because if I’m to be judged by my fruits God knows I won’t pass any test?

Yet deep within the thirst is still there
My soul deeply longs and groans for Him
He still seeks me upto now
I know I’m able to see I’m in a crisis because His grace still saves
But I’m too weak to get myself out of this mess
The cross seems so far to reach to
But my heart, Oh my heart, wants to fall upon it
To leave everything else and cling to it
To never look back again because this pit is ugly
To lift my eyes to God and cry ‘Father forgive me’
Cause’ much as I try to fight it
I know this is the Christian I’m not.

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“LOSING HUSBANDS”

Posted: November 19, 2013 in Letters, Poetry
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He sets out yet again, all happy & determined to make it
It’s the third time this week
You are awed by his tenacity
The downcast face and sombre look that greets you in the evening
As he looks  up to you and gives you that look
That all familiar look
You know they said no to him again

Football has always been his passion
Somehow, he never cuts the team
Finally an opportunity arises, he’s quite optimistic
Not today, that’s what the coach says
With those eyes, he walks away

No one prepared you for this
Seems yours will always be a ‘losing husband’
How do you show him he’s a winner
Your vote of confidence is all he needs

loser

To all wives of ‘losing husbands’
Each time he gives you those eyes
He’s letting you in, exposing his vulnerability
Letting you know that only in your arms is he secure
So waste not this chance dear wives
Welcome him with love
Let him know he’s a king in his house
Don’t pity him, let him know his strengths
Be the cushion he falls on when the world beats him
Be the world to him, for if you are
It doesn’t matter what the rest think
They may brand him a looser
But you share a secret together
One that binds you forever
The reason why he gives you those eyes
The reason you are his wife
The challenge is hard but take it confidently
After all, you are his woman

Will You Love Me Tomorrow?

Posted: November 18, 2013 in Letters, Poetry
Tags: , ,

Will you love me tomorrow
When I fall short from your graces again
When time and time again
I find new ways to hurt you
When my words of apology
Are just rehearsed lines for the play
When I fail to deliver on a promise
When I’m too weak to say no to temptation
When harsh words keep cutting deeper and harder
When I fail to play my role as your partner
When I share with you my weaknesses
When fear engulfs me and I cry out for help
When I show you that I’m just human
Will you still love me
Or would you be the first to cast a stone?

Forgotten Lover

Posted: May 10, 2013 in Poetry
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It’s past midnight, sleep eludes me and thoughts flash through my mind,

I’m nostalgic about the good times, the sweet times, the crazy times, the US times,

miss

Times when we forgot about the world,

When like children we loved innocently,

When we made memories out of any and everything that came our way,

Those were the good old days, Old because they are gone,

Never to be repeated, at least, not with me,

It’s this that got me thinking,

Are those memories also etched deep in your mind,

Will you remember me when the wind blows and the cold breeze leaves you longing for warmth,

Will you remember me in the dark of night when the only light you have is the moon,

Will I occasionally pop in your mind when you think of writing a love song,

Will you smile when you remember my jokes and me being all silly,

Will I be completely erased from the milestones in your life,

Will you remember the assurance of love you had when all were against you,

Will you remember me in the silence when alone,

Or in the hustle of the crowd amidst drowning noise,

Will you remember how it felt looking into my eyes,

Or will I, just like seasons that come and go,

Be a forgotten lover who left no mark behind?

strangers

MURDERED LOVE

Posted: July 10, 2012 in Poetry
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 Love watched from afar, Love grieved from afar

A people so wicked who will redeem them

His wrath was boiling over and the creation became His enemies

Doom and destruction was certain, for the cup of his wrath was full

Man after man, plague after plague, prophet after prophet They just never learnt,

The flood was quickly forgotten Sodom & Gomorrah became a mythical story

Messengers were constantly killed but still there was no solution

Then love came down, Love decided to dwell with men

How else would he save them unless he went to them

So love left His holy place and came down to sinful earth to provide a solution

A solution that only Love could give, Only Love could understand

The day was set and the heavenly glory left behind

Even though the whole fullness of deity was still in Him

Love became man, Love dwelt among men, Love had compassion on men

Love even became a messenger, delivering the message of deliverance

But would they hear it, would they listen to Him Did they even know who He was

The people He planned to save started planning His death

Oh wicked men, if only you knew who walked with you on this earth

Love could have thwarted their plans, for he knew them

He is the one who actually works in us to will and to act

But He let it be, the cup was near, it was already tilted

He had to drink the content or the people He loved would

So like a sheep to the slaughter house, Love let them lead Him

With songs of crucifixion they led Him With eyes of love He looked at them

Hoping they would gaze deeper and see who He really was

But nay, they were a stubborn people & Love had already decreed his own fate

To the cross, they led Him amidst flogging and mockery

To the cross, they nailed Him with nails so long and thick

On the cross, they raised Him with arms of love still outstretched

On that day, redeeming love and retributive justice joined hands,Murdered Love

So blind were the people that they could not see his love

So they ‘Murdered Love’

Thinking he was just like them, not knowing that Love, true Love can’t be killed

Not with stones, not with nails

With groans and pains, Love gave up his soul With joy and praise Love resurrected from the dead

Love resurrected and this time Love is ready to pour out His wrath to sinful man

Murdered love, that we may receive life

Do ye not see?

Grace & Peace

A LETTER TO MY BROTHER

Posted: June 20, 2012 in Letters
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My dear beloved brother, you will probably never see this leave alone read it, but still, I will write it. I write this letter with a heavy heart and with cries and pains no words can describe because it is about you, my loving brother. I remember when we were young and dad had just gotten a transfer, it was me, you and him before the others could join us. You were a very responsible boy, played your duties as an older sibling diligently and lovingly. You would wake up early, prepare breakfast, and serve it, before rushing to school yourself. Those were the good old days.

Then you grew up, adolescence came together with its bag of challenges. I do not know if you were not too strong to overcome them or you just chose to entertain them. The sweet, handsome, bright young boy was quickly replaced by something else. Suddenly, school was an option, education became just another word and drugs became your closest friends. How you managed to finish school beats me but God has his ways. You finished but failed since you were a bright boy who chose to waste his life. You are a great thinker and quite good in literature and have your way with words, traits I have noticed. I doubt if you have seen them yourself. The transition from teenage to adulthood has been the worst. You became a great shadow of your former self. Always drinking, always smoking whilst supplementing with other drugs. You chose to hang with bad company, which surely corrupted your good morals. You began wasting away, not only physically but also mentally, emotionally and spiritually. You became your own idol. Pleasing yourself at whatever costs. So many times you’ve escaped death narrowly, evaded arrest plus a myriad of things we may not know of. Do you ever see the hand of God in all these?

You drink, laugh and merry with your friends but deep down you are a tormented soul. Deep down you long for home, you long for peace, you want out. Why can’t you see it brother, you cannot do this on your own. In and by yourself there is no capacity to change for the better. It is not your life; it was given to you, why not entrust it to God the sustainer of all life? You need God brother. Do you ever see the pain you cause us, your family? Yes, you do not just affect your life but those of people around you. We tried loving you, then we became angry, anger grew to resentment and bitterness for some of us. We do not understand you. We try but we don’t. We don’t understand how you would just let yourself go, how you would waste your life, throw it all away. Many a times we have failed you as your family, many a times, we have not shown you love; we have given up on you, forgetting that we ourselves aren’t any better and it’s only by God’s grace that we are what we are. So, I pray for you brother. I pray to God that you may find solace in Him. That He may enable you to kill your idols and worship the God who sits on the throne. I pray that when the trumpet blows for you, you will be found ready. I pray salvation; I pray freedom, love and joy. I pray for us too, that we may learn to understand you, to love you, appreciate you more and show you mercy and grace just as we have received the same. I pray for you brother, because I love you and it hurts that you are wasting your life.

With these few remarks, I put my pen down and continue praying for you. Lord help me not to give up, not forgetting that salvation is from you and that what seems impossible with man you can do it. Even the vilest sinner, you can save. Therefore, I cast him in your care. To all with unbelieving family members, keep praying, keep loving and keep trusting. He who is above all shall surely come through, in His wisdom and time.

Your Loving Sister,

Winnie

 

Grace & Peace